This delightful habit of journaling

Hi, guys.

2010 was a year of advanced suckitude for me. I am not at all sorry to see it go. Not that there weren't a few good things about it, but there were more bad things. I'm pretty sure one of the main reasons I haven't been writing very much is that there isn't much to write about except depressing things, and who wants to read a journal from the depths of despair? But I've got high hopes for 2011, and I'm planning on being around a lot more. Not that I don't obsessively read my flist, 'cause I do. But I've been bad at commenting and even worse at posting, and that's got to stop. So.

( The Best and Worst of 2010 )

So, going forward. I'm going to find a job, dagnabit. I've got another niece on the way in Februrary. I've got an idea for a non-fiction book (that could easily turn into a series) for the LDS market that has real possibilities. If I can get a job, I'll be in Orlando with my peeps for the release of DH II. They're doing The Music Man at the Utah Shakespeare Festival this year. I've got a membership to a gym and goals and plans for everything from losing weight to organizing my stuff to getting more knitting done. I got $400 from my parents for Christmas (passing on some of my mom's inheritance) that's earmarked for an iPhone once I have a job.

And you'll see me around a lot more. :)

Happy New Year, everyone.

I feel like such an LJ failure. I used to be so good at it, taking the time to post an entry even when I didn't really have the time. Now I'm overflowing with time, and I still don't post. What is wrong with me?

So. New goal. Two posts a week. I can do that, I think. Yes.

Quick catch-up:

Life has still not returned back to normal following the deaths of my grandparents, because now we're (well, my mom specifically, but how she spends her time directly influence how I spend mine :P) trying to clean out my grandparent's house enough that we can get it on the market. Both my grandparents were collectors and packrats, so it's taking a while. I have thus far inherited my grandmother's sewing box, a Roseville vase (Grandma collected pottery), a duck (Grandpa loved them, especially decoy ducks), and possibly one of my grandma's original paintings (she was actually quite talented, I think). Plus several small things I'd given them over the years, like hand-knitted slippers and stuffed dogs. I told my mom to keep the shawl I knitted for my grandma; I think she'll enjoy it more, and it'll eventually get back to me anyway.

It's hard to think about them in the past tense.

My work cut me back to part-time for the summer (I really can't blame them, as I usually only have about an hour's worth of actual work to do on any given day, hence the plenty of time to write LJ entries) which has thrust me back into the job search. Even if I go back to full time in September, which was hinted at, I simply can't take the chance that they're just going to do it again next summer. I've had a few interviews, several of which seemed promising, but none of which ended in offers. One more today. Not getting my hopes up.

The day of my grandma's funeral, I had tickets to see Keane in Las Vegas (so did my sisters and two friends). My mom and her siblings felt bad that I had to rearrange my plans (the funeral had to be held that day due to some family drama), so they and my parents chipped in to fly us down after the funeral. They were going to pay for round-trip airfare, but I just couldn't justify taking $900 out of my aunts' and uncles' and mom's inheritance for the sake of three $35 concert tickets. But I also felt like my grandma would have wanted us to go, and would have offered the same deal. So we reached a compromise-- we took a plane to Vegas, then my parents came and picked us up the next day. It was an awesome concert-- general admission with no seats on the ground floor, and my friends had gotten there early enough to get really good spots only 4 rows back. By the time the concert ended, though, we'd moved up to the second row. Nothing like being mere feet from Tom Chaplin as he sings. When mom and dad came the next day, we stopped in Cedar City and took in a play at the Shakespearean Festival-- Pride and Prejudice. It was excellent, and, I think, a good diversion for my mom (as was the whole weekend).

Two weeks later, I, my sister, and our friends Sarah and Carolyn met up with angua9 and connielane for a real Shakefest experience. My next post will be a write up of the whole trip and the plays especially. I convinced my mom and dad to go back to see The 39 Steps, and we're taking my Auntie Anna, my Aunt Jeanine and Uncle Steve, and my Grandma By with us. Next Friday night. I also offered to watch the kids so my married siblings and their spouses can see it too. Ben and Laura have already taken me up on the offer, and I think Ben and Amanda will do the same two weeks from today. It seriously is the funniest play I've ever seen.

I desperately need to clean my room and do a major stuff purge. Anyone have any recommendations for good books on organization?

I bought the Costco 24-hour Fitness prepaid 2-year membership at the end of June, but haven't gone once. Such is the craziness that is my life.

I'm really trying to reign in my spending and actually live off an actual budget. So far I've done well for a few weeks and then not so well. I need a full-time job, gosh darnit. How else am I supposed to get ahead instead of just treading water?

Can't wait for Mockingjay. :D

Nostaliga posts will continue, but not right now. My grandma has taken a turn for the worse and probably won't live out the week.

I'll be back when I can.

It's a slow day at work today (two of the three CPAs I work for are on-site with clients this afternoon), so I decided to actually update this thing. Hi. Anyone still there?

I'm actually really glad it's slow, because I was up until 2:30 last night reading The God of the Hive. Considering I started it at about, what, 10:15 PM (I had spent all day re-reading The Language of Bees), that's not a bad read rate. :P I knew it was a stupid idea to even start on it, since the previous book was a cliffhanger, meaning it was highly unlikely there would be any lulls to allow me to get bored enough to fall asleep. My second mistake, of course, was taking it to bed with me, instead of being sensible and leaving it upstairs to await the morning. You'd think that after more than 25 years of being literate, I'd learn my lesson by now. Apparently not.

The book was very good, though, and worth the sleep-deprived hangover of today.

I read it on my nook, since it's the end of the month and I've already overspent my book budget. I couldn't *wait*, though, so I overspent it $9.99 for the ebook instead of $16 or so for the hardcover. I'll buy the dead-tree version next month.

This whole sticking-to-a-budget thing has never been a strength of mine, so it's not surprising that I'm overspending. Part of it is that with starting work again, I'm finally able to get necessities that I've been putting off while I was unemployed (like work-appropriate clothes that fit-- 9 months of unemployment turned me from semi-lazy into super-lazy as far as physical activity is concerned), and the prospect of a nice paycheck twice a month has made me a bit, umm, giddy. But I'm determined to make it work, even if it is a work in progress. I'm trying to follow Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps to becoming debt-free and financially responsible. My tax refund went toward my Baby Emergency Fund of $1000 and paying off one of my credit cards. If all goes as planned, I'll be out of debt other than my student loan by the end of the year (maybe even sooner, if I can force myself to make lunches instead of eating out everyday-- a problem for both my wallet and my waistline). At that point, I'm going to squirrel away money so that when I start library school (hopefully in fall of 2011) I won't have to get any more loans to pay for it. The student loans will go into deferment, then I can pay off the loans when I have my MLS In my hot little hand.

I think I will have to go cash-only, though. My debit card is just too tempting.

My job is going well, now that I'm through with the craziness that was tax season. Note to self: mid-March is NOT a good time to start working for a CPA firm, especially when you essentially have to train yourself. We're now into the much-calmer quarterly/payroll tax season, and I-- yes, I-- was able to compute and pay the firm's payroll taxes. I'm so proud of myself.

I still have occasional moments of displacement, though, wondering how someone with an English MA and who hasn't taken a math class since the age of 16 ended up working with all these numbers.

In order to keep my language skills from completely atrophying, and in an effort to make even more money to pay off my debt faster, I'm looking into doing some freelance editing in the evenings. If anyone has any leads for such a thing, do let me know, will you?



Loving Season/Series 5 of Doctor Who so far, although I still get a pang when I think about Ten. Eleven and Amy are awesomesauce, though, and Steven Moffat is still brilliant.

2009 was an interesting year. Lots of really good things happened-- I took lots of fun trips to Disneyland; attended lydaclunas's wedding, where I got to meet rj_anderson, risti, callyperry, and Melanie aka drummergirl in person for the first time, and see angua9 again; had my best friend cuteculturechic move back to Utah; made a few new friends and reconnected with some old ones; spent tons of time with my family, especially my absolutely ADORABLE nieces and nephew; and, most importantly, FINISHED MY THESIS AND THEREFORE MY MASTERS DEGREE!!!!!!

But there were some bad times, too. I struggled with writers' block and depression, I lost a job I really enjoyed in June and still haven't found a new one, and as a result have been unable to pull myself out of debt. But, honestly, the good times have far outweighed the bad, at least in my memory. So I think, in retrospect, 2009 will be remembered as a good year.

That's not to say I'm not looking forward to new and better things in 2010. :) First order of business is to find a job, and work on getting out of debt. I'm also fully committed to being a better friend this year-- both in person and online. And I'm going to work hard to be better with my health-- exercise, sleep, nutrition, the works.

So I hope to see you around a bit more this year. Let's see what new days will bring!

I've been meaning to write a good LJ post for ages now, but I'm so out of the habit it just keeps not getting done. But dude, I'm going to do it. So. Here is an update on my life, broken up into easy-to-read sections. If you're not interested in certain things, feel free to skip. For that matter, feel free to skip the whole dang thing, 'cause I've been gone so long I doubt any of you care any more any way. :P

( Work )

( School )

( Books )

( TV )

( Knitting )

( Miscellaneous ).

So, that's my life in a nutshell. I'm really, really going to try to update at least once a week from here on out.

Really.

So, yesterday was the 1-week anniversary of my layoff. I didn't even remember until I was in bed for the night. It's been an interesting week.

And I'm doing fine.

No, really. I'm actually quite surprised at how well I'm taking it. I really have been able to look at this whole thing as a gift, rather than as a misfortune. Of course, who knows how long this will last-- maybe when my savings account starts looking much more meager than it is now. But for now, I'm fine.

Some of it, of course, is because I'm in such a different situation this time around. While the layoff was just as sudden-- or even more so, since I got about 20 minutes notice before I clocked out for the last time-- I've been sort of mentally preparing myself for a while, just in case. I also got 2 weeks of severance pay and all my unused vacation, which I didn't get last time. My unemployment payment will be higher and extend for a longer period of time, since I worked more last year for more pay. I qualify for COBRA, and also for the federal COBRA subsidy, which means I'm guaranteed my current benefits for at least 18 months for only a little more than what I'm currently paying. I still live at home and have relatively few expenses (a student loan and a credit card payment, and that's about it), so I'm not too worried about my finances.

And mentally, I'm just in a much better place. I've been seeing a therapist for several months now, and have been taking an anti-depressant. And when I attended lydaclunas's wedding (which was AWESOME, and which I was in the process of writing about when I got laid off and therefore distracted), I spent the weekend either talking about theology and my thesis with callyperry and Melanie or writing processes with rj_anderson and risiti, or both, I came home ready to GO on my thesis. No, I haven't written anything yet-- I'm still trying to get my room clean so I have a pleasant place to write-- but I've got ideas. I've got plans. I feel a definite need to make my voice heard on this subject. And now I have all the time I need.

Last time, I was so worried about finding a new job that I still couldn't write. This time, I'm not going to worry. I'm going to seize the time I've been given, this wonderful chance to finish my thesis before time runs out, and run with it. I'll apply for jobs, of course, but only the minimum needed to keep my unemployment benefits. If I get one, great. If not-- it's okay. It really is.

Not that I don't miss my job. It was a great job, with great people. Hopefully the powers-that-be who decreed that I had to be let go will come to their senses and realize how much they need me, and I can go back. If not-- there's going to be something around the corner. Maybe even something better. Who knows?

For right now, though, I'm okay where I am. And that's a wonderful feeling-- one I haven't had in a long, long time.

Today was my 1 year anniversary at work.

At 4:40, I got laid off.



Happy anniversary to me.

I'm about to head to the airport to catch a flight to Houston, where angua9 and I will play this afternoon before meeting up with rj_anderson, Melanie, and Cally. Then me and RJA and Melanie and Cally will drive to Victoria tomorrow morning to attend lydaclunas's wedding. EEEEEE!!! So excited!!

Saw UP last night. Super duper excellent. I know I said this last year, but I think it's Pixar's best yet. Tender and hilarious and. . . just fabulous. Loved it.


Now let's hope the meclazine can work it's magic on a commuter jet for 3 hours. . .